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in startrek •  2 months ago

Chief Medical Officer's Log, USS Singing
Star Date: 42477.7

We just got a new proposed shipwide protocol for the updated bio-filter on the Mark IV transporter subsystem. I'm aware of the recent chatter on subspace about a particular concern involving unspecified nucleotide.

The problem is, Mark IV has been in operation for a century without a problem. Now, they want to introduce a completely new bio-filter update. The chief engineer has similar concerns.

So it's my job to provide field data on this new protocol. Problem is, LCARS does not provide a callback for this situation.

What I envision is for the Mark IV to come online and immediately warn the operator that a new untested protocol is in the pipe. Give them an option to bypass right then and there.

But apparently, LCARS is not equipped to allow this workflow. The spec says that this is an undesired workflow because emergency operations prohibit unauthorized callbacks from executing in an emergency situation.

I've had extended correspondence with Starfleet Engineering that if the Mark IV comes online in an emergency situation, it's perfectly acceptable to allow this particular workflow. We'd get valuable data from it. So far, they've agreed with my rationale, but this has not reached LCARS for over 6 months.

I've gone ahead and added training notes to the engineers aboard Singing. Let's hope this is enough to deal with the shortcomings of LCARS development.

Remember: Beep-beep-beep-pause-BEEP-pause-BEEP means there's an untested bio-filter about to execute in the Mark IV Transporter Buffer.

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I saw this hanging in the turbolift today. Do not hold your breath.

BA0B1CD6-CA87-40FE-BBDB-957C577C9B62.jpeg

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Great. I bet she doesn't even know that isolinears use physical momentum pathways to translate non-feynman tensor flow.

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Do you want to beam up half of a red shirt?

Cause that's how you beam up half of a red shirt...

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Am I a conspiracy theorist or is this work related satire?

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It is satire, but not work related. Or, not intentionally. I can see how "untested" can imply something though.

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